Usski aankhein khuli lekin chaaron ore andhera hi andhera thha. Ussko samajh nahi aaya ke wo kahan hai aur kyun hai. ussne apna sir thoda sa uthaya to usski gardan mein bahut pain hone laga jisske karan usske muh se ek aah nikal gayi.

“Lete rahiye. Abhi aap itni theek nahi hui hai ke chal fir sakein. Main nurse ko bulata hun” usske kaano mein ek meethi si awaaz padi. Shayad yeh awaaz ussne pehli bhi kahin suni thhi. Tabhi wahan nurse bhi aa gayi.

“Baby lete rahiye… main madat karun kuch? Kya chahiye aap ko” nurse boli

“Main kahan hun?”

“Aapka accident ho gaya thha kuch ghante pehle. Sar pe thodi chot aayi thhi. Chhota sa operation karna pada thha check karne ke liye ke sabhi kuch sahi hai ya nahi. Aapko kuch nahi hua hai”

“par mujhe kuch dikh kyun nahi raha hai”

“aapke sar par patti baandhi gayi hai. aankhein bhi dhaki hui hai. 1 din mein utar jayegi patti. Fir aap sab dekh sakti hain”

Yeh sunkar usski tezi se daudti dhadkan thoda dheere hui. Pichle kuch din ke saari baatein usse ek jhatke mein yaad aa gayi ke who kaun hai aur yahan kyun hai.

“Madam aapko kuch chahiye?”

“haan.. mujhe toilet jaana hai” thode glaani bhare shabdon mein ussne bola.

Nurse ne usski saari zaruratein puri karwa kar waapas usse bistar par leta diya. “madam agar aapko thoda theek lag raha hai to kya main aapki kuch details le loon? Aapke ghar walon ko bhi abhi tak khabar nahi kiya gaya hai kyunki aapki koi pehchaan nahi ho payi thhi”

“haan le lijiye” ussne kaha aur kuch hi der mein nurse ko apni saari details de daalin.

“madam ab aap so jaiye. Koi ghabraane ki baat nahi hai. main aapke parents ko inform kar deti hoon. Wo jald hi aa jayenge” nurse ne kaha aur chali gayi.

Ab usska dil waapas zor zor se dhadakne laga. Pata nahi usske parents kya kahenge. Pata nahi ab aage kya hoga. Wo inhi vichaaron mein doobi hui thhi ke achanak se hi fir wohi meethi awaaz usske kaano mein padi

“Hey akanksha… so gayi kya?”

“nahi. Kaun hai aap aur mera naam kaise jaante hai”

“main tumhaara saath waale bistar ka dost hun. Tumhaari details sun li thhi jab nurse ko de rahi thhi. Isliye tumhaare baare mein thoda bahut jaanta hun..”

“Kya chahiye tumhein mujh se? kyun disturb kar rahe ho?”

“kuch nahi chahiye. Bas lag raha hai ke tum gham ke saagar mein gote khaa rahi ho. Isliye bas thoda sahaara dene ki koshish kar raha thha”

“nahi chahiye mujhe koi sahaara wagerah. Apne kaam se kaam rakho”

“itni kam umar aur itna gussa? Yeh kaisa anyay hai… gham baantne se hi kam hota hai”

“yaar kyun peeche pade hue ho. Bol diya na ek baar ke chup raho aur apne kaam se kaam rakho. Kyun zabardasti meri zindagi mein jhaankne ki koshish kar rahe ho”

“nahi nahi.. aisa kuch nahi hai. mujhe raat ko neend nahi aati. Aaj tumhein apne paas paya to socha aaj ki raat thodi theek kat jayegi.. aur kuch nahi hai”

“I am seriously not interested.” Aakanksha ne kaha aur usski taraf apni peeth kar ke fir apne baare mein sochne lagi. Kuch samay baad fir ussko wohi meethi awaaz aayi

“Aakanksha, so gayi kya?”

“yaar kya problem hai tumhaari?”

“Maine to apni problem bata di. Aap bhi bata do. Kyun aayi chalti car ke neeche?”

“main nahi aayi. Wo theek se nahi chala raha thha”

“Koi loss hua thha ?”

“Nahi”

“Pyaar ka chakkar?”

“Maine tumse koi baat nahi karni….”

“Hmm.. pyaar ka chakkar. Yaar aisi chhoti chhoti baaton mein pata hai kabhi apni zindagi barbaad nahi karni chahiye”

“chhoti baat? Chhoti baat nahi hai yeh…” na chahte hue bhi aakanksha dheere dheere uss ke saamne khul rahi thhi.

“Arrey bahut chhoti baat hai… kissi ek ladke ke peeche yun apni zindagi kharaab karna…”

“Tum jaante kya ho humaare baare mein? Kuch nahi… tumhein pata nahi hai ke ussne mere saath kya kiya…”

“Baat tumhaari sahi hai. par aisa kuch kaise ho sakta hai ke ek itni sundar ladki apni jaan dene par utar aaye?”

“tum yahan meri madat kar rahe ho ya mujhse flirt karne ki koshish?” aakanksha ka volume thoda sa upar hua

“shhh.. baaki log jag jayenge… main flirt nahi kar raha. Flirt karna to mujhe aata hi nahi. Main to bas aise hi…”

“bahut chahti thhi main usse. Aisa koi din nahi gaya pichle ek saal jab maine usske baare mein na socha ho. Humaare baare mein na socha ho. Sote jagte, uthte baithte bas wo hi mere dimag mein ghoomta rehta thha. Sapnon ka ek mahal bana liya thha maine. Iss mahal mein sirf do log thhe – ek main aur ek wo. Aur ussne ek hi pal mein saara mahal tod diya. Mere dil ko laakhon chhote chhote tukdon mein baant diya. Ab in tukdon ko samet kar waapas apni zindagi shuru karna mere liye mumkin nahi hoga…”

“kyun mumkin nahi hoga….”

“tum iss baat ko nahi samjhoge.. ek saal maine usske saath zindagi guzari hai. reh reh kar har lamha mujhe satata hai. kaise itni andhi ho sakti thhi main? Main usske pyaar mein pagal rahi aur wo …”

“Kya ussne kabhi tumse kaha ke wo tumhein pyaar karta hai”

“kuch cheezein kehne ke liye nahi hoti. Ehsaas hi kaafi hota hai. agar pyaar nahi karta to itna samay mere saath aise rehta?”

“agar pyaar karta hota to kya doosri ki taraf jaata? Tumne kabhi kisi ka dil toda hai?”

“Haan.. saari baat ab ghoom fir kar mere upar hi daal do. Tum sab ladke ek jaise hote ho”

“Nahi aakanksha aisi koi baat nahi hai. kayi baar hum saamne waale ke pyaar mein itna doob jaate hai ke mann hi mann yeh soch lete hai ke wo bhi humaare se utna hi pyaar karta hai…”

“Kya matlab?”

“Dekho pyaar ki yehi khoobi hai. pyaar aadmi ko andha kar deta hai. jab pyaar mein koi apni kahani likh le na, to jo bhi aas paas hota hai wo uss kahani mein fit ho hi jaata hai. Tumhaare dil aur dimag mein usske liye aisi feelings hongi ke tum soch hi nahi paoge kabhi ke usske andar tumhaare liye aisi feelings nahi hai. dil to hota hi kaanch ka hai. galti humaari hi hoti hai ke hum ek kaanch ka mahal bana kar dil ko uss mein rakhte hain. Mahal toota, dil toota. Arrey itne nazuk dil ko koi kaanch ke mahal mein rakhta hai kya?”

“ matlab tumhaara bhi dil toda hai kisi ne…”

“haan.. maine hi toda hai apna dil. Mujhe bhi yehi laga ke wo mujhe bahut chahti hai, tabhi mere saath itna time guzaarti hai. usske pyaar mein maine bhi bahut naghme likhe. Bahut khwaab sanjoye. Kabhi socha bhi nahi thha ke yeh ek tarfa pyaar hai. usski dosti ko hi main pyaar samajh baitha. Jo chaha wo mil na paya. Jab yeh asliyat mere upar aayi, tab maine bhi kuch kuch waisa hi kiya jaise tumne kiya thha…”

“arrey baby, tum soyi nahi abhi tak… main tumhein ek pain killer de deti hoon. Nahin to dard se neend nahi aayegi. Neend ki dawai bhi de deti hoon. Tumhaare gharwalon ko phone kar diya hai, wo kal dopahar tak aa jayenge.” Nurse aayi aur aakanksha ko yeh bolte hue ek injection de diya.

“Chalo yeh achcha hua. Dekhna jab kal tumhaare maa baap tumse milenge to kitne chintit honge. Isse kehte hai asli pyaar. Yehi dekh kar mujhe bhi pyaar kya hai yeh ehsaas hua. Kya ek saal ke pyaar ke peeche tum un maa baap ke pyaar ko mitaane ka soch rahi thhi jinhone bina kisi shart ke tumse itna pyar kiya. Ek baat hamesha yaad rakhna… pyaar waisa karo, jo tumhein jeene par majboor kare. Waise nahi jo tumhaari jaan le le. Hamesha yaad rakho ke jitna tumne kisi se pyar kiya hai, uss se zyada koi aur bhi iss duniya mein tumhein pyaar karne wala ho sakta hai. aaj kal ki generation ki yehi problem hai, apne pyaar ko pyaar ka darja dete hai aur jo doosre unse pyaar karein wo unko bekaar lagta hai. bhagwaan ne tumhein nayi zindagi di hai. koshish karna ke asli pyaar kya hai yeh samajh pao. Agar meri tarah tumhein bhi yeh baat der se samajh aayi to bas aise hi attak ke reh jaogi….” Aakanksha ke kaano mein bas yehi aakhri shabd pade aur wo neend ke aagosh mein chali gayi..

Jab usski neend khuli to usske ekaek usski aankhon mein tez roshni padi jisske karan usski aankhein waapas band ho gayi.

“Beta.. kaisi ho.. pura din soti rahi tum” ussko apne bistar ke paas se awaaz aayi

“Theek hoon maa. Aap kaisi hain”

“Bas theek hain. Teri halat ki khabar sunte hi hum daude chale aaye. Shukar hai bhagwan ka ke tumhein zyada chhot nahi lagi. Bas 1-2 fractures hain jo jald hi theek ho jayenge”

Ab ussne dheere dheere apni aankhein kholi aur apne maa aur papa ko apne paas paaya. Wo ek private ward mein thhi. “mujhe yahan kab shift kiya?”

“Aap to hamesha se yahin thhi baby. Humne aapko shift nahi kiya” dawai le kar aati hui nurse ne bola. “aur ab kuch din mein aap yahan se seedha ghar hi jayengi”

“nahi nahi.. kal raat ko main shayad general ward mein thhi. Mere saath waale bed par koi thha jo mere se baat kar raha thha. Usski awaaz jaani pehchaani lag rahi thhi. Par pooch nahi payi ke wo kaun hai”

“nahi baby. Aap to yahin thhi jab se aayi hain. Aur yahan aapke siwa koi nahi thha. Night duty wali nurse bar baar aakar bas tumhaari halat check kar rahi thhi. Unke siwa to koi iss kamre mein aaya bhi nahi. Shayad dawaiyon ke asar se hi aapko aisa laga hoga ke aap kisi se baat kar rahi hain”

Uss samay aakanksha ne kuch kaha to nahi par usska dil yeh maan lene ko tayaar nahi thha ke wo raat mein akeli thhi. Usske parents pehle hi bahut chintit thhe issliye ussne yeh baat kisi se bhi nahi kahi. 2 din mein wo hospital se discharge ho gayi aur usske parents usske poora theek hone tak ke liye usse apne ghar le gaye.

Ek din wo aise hi apni college ki year book dekh rahi thhi jab ek jaana pehchaana chehra usske saamne aaya. Usska dil zor zor se dhadakne laga. Kaanpte haathon se ussne phone uthaya aur ek number milaya

“Anjali.. hi.. Aakanksha bol rahi hoon… mujhe poochna thha ke humaare saath college mein ek ladka hota thha na Rahul.. usska kya hua..”

“Arrey tujhe nahi pata.. college ke kuch din baad hi ussne apni kalai kaat ke suicide kar liya thha. Koi pyaar vyaar ka chakkar thha shayad.