"Look, about last night," Jake said, walking into the kitchen. It was the morning after I'd stormed out of his bedroom and he was, no doubt, going to try to make amends.

I figured I knew what my cousin was going to say. That he was sorry he'd messed things up by coming on too sexy with me and that he promised he'd back off if I agreed to stick around a while longer with him and Uncle Rob.

But all he managed was, "No hard feelings, okay?"

I turned to face him, waiting for the kettle to boil. He was wearing just his t-shirt and boxers and at twenty-years-old, a couple of years older than me, his six foot frame was becoming quite toned and muscular.

I replied, "I'm just making a coffee then I'm gonna shoot through after I've filled up my backpack."

"Maybe that's for the best," he nodded, walking past me to grab a cup from the shelf.

Surprised, I asked him what he meant.

"If you're getting freaked out by the way dad and I are so sexually open about stuff, you're probably not going to be that comfortable staying here."

Seeing how hurt I must have looked, he patted my arm and went on, "You're welcome to stay with us - I know I can speak for dad on that score - and we both love having you around... you're loads of fun and we both enjoy getting to know you..."

"So why are you saying it's for the best if I leave?"

"Because you looked totally blown-over last night when dad walked in on us squatting on the floor together and... you know... playing about..."

"I wouldn't say I was blown-over... just caught a bit off-guard..."

"Well - no offence mate - but you look like you haven't slept a wink. If a bit of jokey sex stuff is gonna get you so wound up, our house might not be the most suitable place for you to stay."

Now I really was feeling messed up. I'd expected him to start pleading with me to stay, but here he was basically telling me to either get with the program or the get the fuck out.

"The thing is Shane," he went on, "I think you'd get a lot out of staying with the two of us. We had fun last night - at least we did until you got all weirded-out - and I reckon you could learn a lot from me and my dad. We could learn stuff from you too, but not if you're gonna flounce off back to your bedroom every time you get a hard-on..."

"I'm not that much of a Melv," I said back. "We wanked off together the other night - that was gold, mate... I was kinda hoping we could do it again."

"We can," he smiled. "As often as you like! But last night you really lost it, just because I was joking around rubbing the front of my jeans against your butt..."

"It wasn't that!" I countered. "That felt ripper... you saw how horny it made me..."

"What was it, then?" he asked, sounding more caring now that he realised it wasn't anything that he'd done that had triggered my reaction.

Spooning some coffee into both our cups, I tried to explain. "It was after your dad walked in on us and said that... well... basically you should shag me for real while he was in his bedrooom playing around with his girlfriend..."

Jake smiled and grabbed the boiled kettle to finish off making our drinks. "I think he was just joking, but... you know... even if he wasn't, what would be the big deal about that?"

"Your dad wouldn't mind if you were rootin' me up the butt?" I asked him.

"He'd probably be well chuffed," he grinned. "He likes that I play around with guys as well as girls and I think he'd be really pleased that I was helping you figure out if you like that too."

He chuckled at my stunned expression and said, "But like I said, Shane... I really think he was just joking!"

I stared at him as he put the kettle back on its stand and he walked over to the fridge to fetch the milk.

After he'd poured it, he patted my arm again and said, "We're a very sexual pair of guys, me and my dad. He gets up to some stuff that would probably surprise you and I think he's kinda proud that seeing how liberated he has become has given me the confidence to explore my own sexuality."

I nodded and he beamed a really warm smiled at me.

He said, "I'd like to give you that same confidence, buddy. But you've gotta trust me and my dad a bit more... you might find you enjoy stuff you didn't know you would..."

I tried to smile back at him. "It's just tough for me, Jake. It's so different from what I'm used to..."

"I know, Shane," he nodded, rubbing me affectionately on the shoulder. "And we'll take it as slow as you like if you want to give us both a chance."

"Yeah... I reckon I'd like that, mate..."

He grinned at my agreement and stirred the milk into our coffee.

===

I think my cousin kept a deliberate distance the rest of the day, giving me time think through the suggestion he'd made about experimenting sexually while I was staying with him and Uncle Rob.

The only time that there was direct reference to sex from him was when we were on the train together on the way back from a day out in Corby. He'd guffawed at some story on the newsfeed on his phone about some girl's dad who had accidentally snapchatted her a picture of his dick on full chocker.

He'd shown me the picture - the offending boner pixellated out - and had laughed, probably momentarily forgetting the 'slow as you like' thing we had going on, and said, "My dad once did that to me!"

"Your dad sent you a picture of his chub?" I asked. Even before I'd finished the question, I knew the tone of my voice had been way too shocked and judgemental.

Jake's demeanour had changed: his smile abruptly vanished and he snatched his phone back from me.

I said, "Sorry - I didn't mean to sound like I thought it was wrong... I just got a surprise he'd do that to you."

Jake looked out of the window at the countryside whizzing past and said, "It was a mistake, okay? My name was the next one down from the person he'd meant to send it to."

"I'm sorry," I said again. "I didn't mean to make out like I thought he was coming onto you..."

Jake didn't turn back around to look at me and remained sullen and remote. He said, "He's not good with phones. Someone sent him a racy photo - as I joke I think - and he thought it would be funny to send one back. Pressed send on the wrong name... end of story."

I didn't say anything back as he was clearly pissed off at my reaction. I started to wonder if maybe he was thinking that it was going to be too much hard work to try and broaden my outlook on sex and that if I suggested leaving again he'd probably just open the front door for me.

Back at his house during the evening, things were more fun and relaxed and I was pleased that his dad's godawful girlfriend, Debbie, didn't come over to bore us with stories about the vets surgery where she worked. After supper when we we'd finished watching some telly, Jake got up to head to his bedroom and I asked him if he'd like me to join him. I was hoping the two of us could wank off together again and I decided that, if we did, I'd let him rub his dick up and down between my bum-cheeks again - but this time without my jeans and undies getting in the way.

But Jake was playing hard to get. I think he'd decided that from now if I wanted to play around with him, I had to go out of my way to really show him how much.

He said, "I'm tired, bud. I think I'm just gonna hit the sack."

I tried, "I don't mind... you know... chillin' with you 'til you drop off... the two of us just messin' around a bit..."

But that wasn't enough for him and I wasn't prepared to say anything more suggestive in front of his dad.

He said, "Naah... I'm just gonna crash if it's all the same, dude. I'll see you in the morning... maybe I'll take you to meet a couple of my mates..."

He went off to bed, leaving me downstairs with his dad. That was all right as Uncle Rob opened a bottle of wine for us both and he told me some stuff I didn't know about my gran and grandad.

But all the time I was wondering how this well-spoken Englishman had got into snapchatting other people pictures of his dick. The intended recipient can't have been Debbie - Jake would have said if it had been - but was presumably another woman he'd somehow hooked up with through the app.

Maybe that was what Jake had meant when he'd said his dad had become sexually liberated in recent years. Perhaps he'd got into sexting or was doing cyber stuff over his webcam. If that was the case, it sounded more sad than interesting and I was in no great rush to find out more.

===

We went to bed at around midnight and, even though I was exhausted from the poor sleep I'd had the night before, my body-clock still hadn't adjusted to UK time. At two in the morning I was still lying there wide awake.

Finally I gave into the nagging of my bladder which the wine had left me with, and got out of bed to make my way to the bathroom.

As I shuffled my way down the hallway and was going past Jake's room, I noticed that his bedroom door was half open. This was the open door policy he'd mentioned to me on my first night in the house: with him and his dad being more relaxed around each other than me and my dad could ever be, they seem to enjoy deliberately infringing on each other's privacy.

I paused at his door to take a squiz inside. There was enough light coming from his computer monitor to make out my cousin's bed with him lying on top of it. I don't know why but I felt a sudden urge to push the door open more fully and have a proper look at him sprawled out on his bed.

His doona was half off and I could see he was naked. He was lying on his stomach and I could see the curve of his back, the squat mounds of his bum and the muscular sweep of his legs in the half light. I was surprised by how pale his skin was all the way down from his neck to his feet. All my mates have tans from all the sun and surfing, and when I've seen them in the buff the only white bits are where their boardies cover them.

As I stood purving on him, I realised that my cousin was gently moving - not all of him, but mainly just his hips and thighs.